Join host Eugene Loh as he shares self-improvement and life-affirming perspectives on happiness, success, worry, contentment, forgiveness, relationships and more.
One of 938LIVE's most popular programmes, A Slice of Life has been written, produced and presented by Eugene Loh since 1998.
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Weekdays at 7.55am, 12.55pm, 2.55pm, 6.55pm and 9.55pm (on Fridays, the programme is replaced by a repeat broadcast of radio forum Beyond the News/Campus).
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This week's online script from A Slice of Life:
A SLICE OF LIFE – Dealing With Difficult People
Wherever communities exist, difficult people can be found. Whether they’re inherently unreasonable or simply prejudiced against you, these people add stress to our lives. And if you’re not fully equipped to deal with them, you may find yourself getting frustrated and miserable each time the prospect of interacting with them comes up.
So how do you manage difficult people?
Well, very often, these people have only one weapon – words. And words can only hurt as much as you’ll allow them. Unfortunately though, words can be very damaging when the victim of the attack chooses to assign them meanings of power and respond in equally negative ways.
When someone you are talking to is unkind, negative or downright rude, it’s easy to get annoyed, angry and even aggressive. However this will only make the situation worse. Instead of reacting negatively, look for the positive intention of the person you are talking to. Now this doesn’t have to be real or true; your job is just to trick your mind.
Maybe your attacker is hurt or frustrated. Maybe he’s repressed and unhappy, and this nasty behaviour is the only way he knows how to relieve himself. Now would you want to be angry with a person like that? I’m sure you have better things to do, your own goals to pursue, your own happiness to cherish.
Your own emotional state is entirely up to you. Unless you are in charge of how you feel, your ability to communicate effectively will always be limited and dependent on other people.
When you are in a potentially stressful situation and everyone around you is losing their cool this does not mean you have to join them! You will be able to contribute a lot more if you remain calm and centered. Staying calm and resourceful is a choice you can make.
One way to do this is to step outside the situation. Get a wider perspective. Give yourself time to defuse. In heated moments, we can forget that what we’re facing is really quite trivial, that there are other things and people more worth our time and energy.
When you do this successfully, you will think of ideas to handle the situation better and you will also feel less bothered by the stress of other people.
WRITTEN BY EUGENE LOH
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